Disrespect

I have noticed, lately, that the size-related opinions of those in favor of size-acceptance are often subtly disrespected. I base this on my own experiences, obviously, but I have a feeling other BBW’s/FA’s/BHM’s/etc. have noticed or encountered similar things. And this is of course separate from the discrimination fat people face – that is blatant and often on purpose. But what I mean is the little things – parents and friends who talk about their diets in front of you or how fat other people you know are getting, as if that’s not going to bother you and as if these discussions shouldn’t offend you at all because you’re “beyond” such things or whatever. Fat jokes made by those you have trusted with your self-respect, while the target is another fat person, as if that’s not going to offend you either. Friends who say they agree with you about this country’s issues with weight, then turn right around and say how proud they are that their girlfriend has lost X amount of pounds and how that inspires them to lose some. Other friends who triumphantly declare to you that they’ve bought a new pair of jeans, and now they can fit into a size 16 again.

Situations where weight needs to be lost for health reasons, or being glad that you can fit into smaller clothing because that means more clothes options are available to you, are a totally different story (and the clothes thing is a totally different rant). But all of the above situations are often image based, having nothing to do with health or money. And its just disrespectful, I feel, to hear these kinds of things from people who say they respect your opinions, understand, and care about you even if they disagree. In my case, these are often people who I avoid talking about size with because I know they don’t share the same views and I do respect that. But apparently its okay for them to do these little things that undermine my self respect – because face it, all negative fat-related comments hurt a fat person, even if those comments are not directly targeted at them.

That’s it for today, really. I just wanted to get these thoughts out in words since I feel I can’t say any of this to the people who caused them. They wouldn’t understand.

Some Annoyances

Yes yes, I have dropped off the face of the planet. Among other troubles, my computer isn’t working, so I’m behind on pretty much every internet thingy I do. I’m borrowing my llovely, amazing, generous llady’s macbook right now.

But that aside, I have a couple of annoyances to bitch about. And since that’s kinda what I made this blog for (raising awareness through my complaints), here I go.

Firstly, some of you may remember my post about the Runaways character Gertrude Yorkes. She is one of the few fat girls in comicdom, and is totally awesome. I love the series in general, and belong to a group on DeviantArt that collects fanart for the comic and provides a place for fans to talk about the characters, what’s going on in the story, etc. Each week the moderator posts a new Journal Discussion Topic in the club’s journal, with a question for members to answer and discuss/debate amongst themselves. This week’s topic: If the Runaways were in a fight amongst themselves, who would win?

Now, most of the people who commented said intelligent things, and a joke started about it being a food fight instead of a fist fight. Then of course, someone said something TOTALLY ridiculous. And of course, it was someone who until recently I thought was really cool. This individual said, in the context of a food fight, that Gert would win because she would eat all the food.

….Really? Wtf?

Now, in the series, yes, Gert is the fattest girl. However, she is not seen demanding food any more than the more anorexic-looking team members, or inhaling whole pizzas in under 5 minutes or anything like that. But this asshole assumes that because she’s fat, she must eat more than thin people do, and its okay to make fun of her for it (yes, I realize that I’m getting all worked up over a fictional character, but this is important to me and it definitely applies to real fat people too).

So I responded, asking him if that was indeed his lame attempt at a fat joke, and if he was really serious. We’ll see how this pans out.

Also, today at work, I was sitting at the front desk (I work as a receptionist at a hotel and we’re pretty much chained there) when a female server came up to use the elevator, instead of using the stairs. Because she asserted the desire to use the elevator instead of using the stairs, I made a half-serious joke about how I use the elevator a lot because I’m lazy (and laziness, my friends, has nothing to do with weight!). However, as soon as I said that this server made a weird face at me, then headed for the stairs after all, claiming she needed the exercise.

Now, maybe I’m being paranoid and oversensitive, but my conclusion from that was that she suddenly didn’t want to be like me, the fat girl, and exercised to prevent gaining the 5,000 pounds she would have suddenly gained by being like the fat girl. I jump to this conclusion, by the way, because I am very outspoken at work about my beliefs in terms of size-acceptance, and this server tends to be a vapid gossip. And of course, it ridiculously hurt my feelings. I was going to confront her about it, but being at work, there wasn’t really a good time. So instead I gripe and moan here ^^; Not as effective, but its too late now.

Finally, there was this thing on the news today about how obese people are supposedly more likely to get migraines. Where the study took place, who did the study, who was tested, or any other important and relevant information was not mentioned at all. All they said was that a study had been done, and it concluded that fat people get migraines. And somehow this was proof enough to broadcast this on television as truth. This is why I don’t watch mainstream news!!! But it was on the TV at work today during break, thus me seeing it.

And now off to try and forget this bollocksness.